Wednesday, January 11, 2017

Moments To Remember : 2016 ~ !



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I added more plans and started making it... it wasn't an easy thing to do especially that am a lot hard on my self to make the things done on time...
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started weekly uploading on my youtube channel add for that I did continuing blog posting.. and also my daily drawings... it wasn't an easy thing... and it was really a time consuming for me... I felt so stressed about that.. especially the deadline.. well I don't like deadline... it keeps me anxious and there is that thing in my head that tell me to always.. u have to finish on time... it irritating me...!  The time kept progressing and I was juggling between all of that.. and with some concerns and things that were not good happened to me that time... I tried to change my schedules.. every two weeks... week for utube and week for the blog( add to that the daily drawing , studying and working on projects ) ... and although I was trying my best... at that time... I don't know why.. but it was the more that I get struggled and felt lost .... i cried a lot... it was hard... I get sick frequently back then.. although my diet system was not that bad... but all of that was from stress and anxiety.. I decided to take break... till the things settle down... but no...  things got worse by time... and that let me to change my schedule like upload monthly.... but again that kept me unmotivated... and the process became slower... and this kind of thing.. made me feeling like am useless if this the right term.... but I tried it for a month and It didn't work with me... then I tried to back to my weekly schedule... but... not regularly... i tried My best back then... with all these struggles and lost that happened to my personal life... and in all of that I was able to draw My First Visual Story ever...!!! and able to upload it... i wake up too early like 3 am everyday to get to finish it... and glad and thankfully I did it... it was a bit of sorrow and a pity bitter experience...!
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After that did take a break for couple of days.. too.. cause I get sick..again.... but I didn't give up... cause I knew that all of these bad things will disappear one day.. and I have to be patient and calm down my self... I knew that it takes time to learn from all of that... and as the time kept moving I did realize tonz of things...!!!

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I did tried again to continue my schedule and.. added to that. a new thing : the preparation to open a shop...my sister discussed that with me prior to the preparation to open a shop to sell my drawings to the people... to spread art.. but I was hesitant.. although that was one of my dreams.. and I want to make it some day.... but I felt back then that it still early to do that.. especially that still am not well known. but I decided at the end to open.. cause at least I will get experience with it... October came to end.. and I expose my self a lot as an artist or let say represent my self more to the public... I started to build up my self again.. to reborn again.. to start newly and freshly... I JUMPED ~!

The rest two months I was alternating things to knew what suited me the best as Hana.. Hinnochan.. and not follow any other schedules... honestly I tried a lot until I came up with my own... it was a little bit long journey.. but it all worth it...!!!

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Now am ready... Am opening my two little wings to start to fly... to be free... to fly... high up in the sky.... ~
So..

OPEN UR DOORS NEW DAYS!!!!
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